The joke thread

[playtime8978]

Originally Posted by CodiMN

I'm sure you've seen this one...but it made me laugh!


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
After having their 11th child, a hick country couple decided 11 was enough, as they could not afford a larger bed.
So the husband went to his veterinarian and told him that he and his cousin didn't want to have any more children.

The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy that could fix the problem but that it was expensive.
A less costly alternative, said the doctor, was to go home, get a cherry bomb (fireworks are still legal in some places. The law hasn't reached out that far yet), light it, put it in an empty beer can, then hold the can up to his ear and count to 10.

The redneck said to the doctor,
"I may not be the smartest man in the world, but I don't see how putting cherry bomb in a beer can next to my ear is going to help me."

"Trust me, " said the doctor.

So the man went home, lit a cherry bomb and put it in a beer can.
He held the can up to his ear and began to count: "1" "2" "3" "4" "5" .......
At which point he paused, placed the beer can between his legs, and resumed counting on his other hand.

oh my word

[Des]

Oh boy you girls sure are wicked ,I felt the pain all the way here in SA

[Hedge]

Originally Posted by Des

Oh boy you girls sure are wicked ,I felt the pain all the way here in SA

Don't get us girls started on being wicked.......

Heather

[LauraN]

Another blond joke for Sue...For some reason this one reminds me of her... She'll understand why and maybe she can use this ploy...

Last year I replaced all the windows in my house with that expensive
double-pane energy efficient kind, and today, I got a call from the
contractor who installed them. He was complaining that the work had been
completed a whole year ago and I still hadn't paid for them.
Hellloooo,......just because I'm blonde doesn't mean that I am
automatically stupid. So, I told him just what his fast talking sales
guy had told me last year, that in ONE YEAR these windows would pay for
themselves! Helllooooo? It's been a year! I told him. There was only
silence at the other end of the line, so I finally just hung up. He
never called back. I bet he felt like an idiot.* */ /*

[camille1585]

Originally Posted by LauraN

Another blond joke for Sue...For some reason this one reminds me of her... She'll understand why and maybe she can use this ploy...

Last year I replaced all the windows in my house with that expensive
double-pane energy efficient kind, and today, I got a call from the
contractor who installed them. He was complaining that the work had been
completed a whole year ago and I still hadn't paid for them.
Hellloooo,......just because I'm blonde doesn't mean that I am
automatically stupid. So, I told him just what his fast talking sales
guy had told me last year, that in ONE YEAR these windows would pay for
themselves! Helllooooo? It's been a year! I told him. There was only
silence at the other end of the line, so I finally just hung up. He
never called back. I bet he felt like an idiot.* */ /*

I don't know what the link is with Sue, but that's too funny!!!

[playtime8978]

Originally Posted by LauraN

Another blond joke for Sue...For some reason this one reminds me of her... She'll understand why and maybe she can use this ploy...

Last year I replaced all the windows in my house with that expensive
double-pane energy efficient kind, and today, I got a call from the
contractor who installed them. He was complaining that the work had been
completed a whole year ago and I still hadn't paid for them.
Hellloooo,......just because I'm blonde doesn't mean that I am
automatically stupid. So, I told him just what his fast talking sales
guy had told me last year, that in ONE YEAR these windows would pay for
themselves! Helllooooo? It's been a year! I told him. There was only
silence at the other end of the line, so I finally just hung up. He
never called back. I bet he felt like an idiot.* */ /*

tooooo funny

[cb977]

Originally Posted by LauraN

Another blond joke for Sue...For some reason this one reminds me of her... She'll understand why and maybe she can use this ploy...

Last year I replaced all the windows in my house with that expensive
double-pane energy efficient kind, and today, I got a call from the
contractor who installed them. He was complaining that the work had been
completed a whole year ago and I still hadn't paid for them.
Hellloooo,......just because I'm blonde doesn't mean that I am
automatically stupid. So, I told him just what his fast talking sales
guy had told me last year, that in ONE YEAR these windows would pay for
themselves! Helllooooo? It's been a year! I told him. There was only
silence at the other end of the line, so I finally just hung up. He
never called back. I bet he felt like an idiot.* */ /*

That does remind me of...me!

[kavanaru]

Originally Posted by LauraN

Another blond joke for Sue...For some reason this one reminds me of her... She'll understand why and maybe she can use this ploy...

Last year I replaced all the windows in my house with that expensive
double-pane energy efficient kind, and today, I got a call from the
contractor who installed them. He was complaining that the work had been
completed a whole year ago and I still hadn't paid for them.
Hellloooo,......just because I'm blonde doesn't mean that I am
automatically stupid. So, I told him just what his fast talking sales
guy had told me last year, that in ONE YEAR these windows would pay for
themselves! Helllooooo? It's been a year! I told him. There was only
silence at the other end of the line, so I finally just hung up. He
never called back. I bet he felt like an idiot.* */ /*

LOL Excellent!!!


now, let us know what is the link with Sue!!

[cb977]

Originally Posted by kavanaru

LOL Excellent!!!


now, let us know what is the link with Sue!!

LOL...that's just something I would do...being a wisea** instead of a blonde

[greenbean]

Ok, this is one of those horrible corny jokes that makes you smack your forehead and groan. I heard it today in my horticulture class.

Which came first, the flower or the seed?

Honestly, I should have expected it. I mean, what would horticulture students care about a chicken and an egg?