Strangely confused about how much to water the Phals

[JaimeZX]

Edit: posted this after reading the first 5-6 pages of "phal abuse stops..." plus a random selection of pages throughout the rest of that thread.

I have a variety of NOID phals acquired at different times. They have all been repotted more than once with coarse bark and a little sphagnum peat moss. I continue to use the clear plastic containers they came in, but I have added numerous holes around the sides to increase airflow.

I have the same problem with all of them, repeatedly. They look great, and healthy. They send up a flower spike or two, the flowers sometimes last for a few days or weeks, then they all dry up and fall off, coupled with a shriveling and eventual yellowing of the leaves.

I go to re-pot and most of the roots have rotted away. So then I have to spend forever cleaning up the bottom of the plant before repotting. Close monitoring over the subsequent months reveals vigorously growing roots, leaves sprout, everything looks great, and the process repeats.

So. Water. I have a bamboo stick in each pot. I water when the stick is dry. Watering means soaking the container in fertilized water for 30-60 minutes, then draining. But confusingly that usually takes three weeks or so. My father-in-law has a bunch of Phals as well and admonishes me to water weekly like he does, but I'm certain if I watered even more often the roots would rot faster.

So I'm thinking I need media that absorbs less? I don't know how else to water more frequently but have the roots be drier.

What am I missing? My most recent "failure" was my biggest and most beautiful phal, six happy leaves and two big spikes with numerous large buds on both; that thing went downhill in about ten days. It currently has two leaves, no spikes, and about three sub-1" rootlets.