Dave, I think we have to get you into frogs. Have your plants live in symbiosis with animals...get them fertilized naturally. There's nothing better then two frogs shagging on a cattleya leaf
heheheh
although shagging usually resorts tot he female's stroking of the male's back, laying eggs and having the male fertilize them few hrs later.
Not exaclty like 2 dogs going at it at a side of the road, hehe